By Your Side
by silver-moon-sapphire-sky
Summary: This is for the CherryblossomHime's contest. HitsuHina pairing, minor other pairings. They still had issues and feelings left over from the Arrancar war that they'd never talked about. When death looms in the future can love still triumph? Re-edited a bit
1. Part 1: Beyond Friendship

**Hi people, **

**I'm back, hope you enjoy this fic. It was meant to be shorter... but it sort of got away from me- don't ask.**

**I wrote it for Cherryblossom-hime's competition.**

**It's HitsuHina mainly, with several other pairings implied.**

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**Part One: Beyond Friendship**

There was only one thought in Hitsugaya Toshiro's head, and it had absolutely nothing to do with sex.

Surprising really, considering he was in fact male, but apparently some men do find other things to think about. On the other hand, he was still more of a boy than an adult, but he was both male and he actually did have hormones, just like all other Shinigami males- even Yamamoto-Soutaicho.

Toshiro sat at his desk with a mountain of paperwork. He'd lost track of the time long ago, all he knew was it was dark outside and the moon was out.

His 'charming' fukutaicho had abandoned her duties to attend the eleventh division's sake party hours ago.

Therefore it was not surprising that the thought going through his mind in a constant mantra was;

'_I will not kill her,'_

He'd decided to invest in a hammer and nails. He was going to literally nail Matsumoto's feet to the floor, and he'd enjoy every minute of it.

That or perhaps he'd Hyorinmaru her into her next cycle of reincarnation early.

"Hitsugaya-kun?" Hinamori knocked a second before entering his office without waiting for him to give her permission.

He didn't mind because it was Hinamori though- anyone else would have gotten a stern look, maybe even a glare, depending upon his mood.

"What is it?" he asked, not looking up from his work.

"Nothing really, I just came to see how you were," Hinamori said, sounding slightly subdued, even hurt.

He looked up into soft brown eyes, "I'm sorry Hinamori. I didn't mean to sound grouchy, I'm tired and Matsumoto is nowhere to be found," he forced his abrupt tone into a more polite one.

"Poor Hitsugaya-kun," she said teasingly, her eyes brightening.

"Hinamori," he admonished.

"Here, let me help you," she said, walking over to his desk.

"You don't have to-" he began purely out of politeness.

"I want to help you," she said, interrupting him.

"Arigato Hinamori," he said, giving her a smile.

It felt like the first time he'd smiled all day.

It was always like that around Hinamori, she just made him feel like smiling all the time. He forced himself not to though, or he'd completely ruin his reputation and no one would ever take him seriously.

"Any time Shiro-chan," she said far too sweetly.

"HINAMORI!" he yelled.

"I'm sorry Hitsugaya-kun, I just couldn't resist," she smirked.

"It's not Hitsugaya-kun either. It's Hitsugaya-taicho," he sniffed, putting his nose up into the air.

It was a tired routine between them, but it was familiar; they both knew what to say and where they stood. After the Arrancar war, with all the uncomfortable feelings between them, they put it into as many conversations as they could.

She giggled, "sorry, Hitsugaya-kun,"

He sighed, "let's just get to work," he just couldn't win against her. She'd never call him Hitsugaya-taicho.

"Of course," she agreed, and he was almost sure she was mocking him- but not absolutely. Mischief simply gleamed from her beautiful, warm eyes.

He felt that annoying rush of heat in his blood, followed by that giddy sensation, and the peculiar desire to pull her into his arms and…

"Hitsugaya-kun, you're red. Are you alright?" she asked anxiously.

He hated that stupid blush, and the way it always occurred around her.

"Fine," he said gruffly, and forced himself to focus on his work. He had the niggling feeling she was laughing at him though.

Momo smiled as she watched him seriously study the page in front of him, he was so…

He was still himself. It was nice to know that there were some people you could always depend on, who never changed.

Hitsugaya-kun had changed very little from the rude boy who'd spat watermelon seeds at her, and whenever she felt sad or needed some comfort, he was there. He'd always been there, and she felt that he would always be there, no matter what. He was a stable and constant factor in her life, one that she needed

It was over two hours later before they finally finished the paperwork.

She leant back in her seat "Hitsugaya-kun," she murmured, staring out the window at Rukongai behind the walls of Seireitei, barely visible underneath the crescent moon.

"Remembering the past?" he asked quietly, setting his ink brush carefully in it's box. He always understood her, even when she said barely anything at all.

"Hai. We always used to watch the sunset and eat the watermelon that Ba-san bought together," Momo said quietly, giving him a small smile.

He was sharing her chair before she knew he'd moved and his arm suddenly snaked around her waist, pulling her to lean against him. She rested her head against his, and they both looked out that window.

He muttered into her ear, "I still miss those times,"

"So do I Shiro-chan," Hinamori whispered, her hand clasping the one that was settled comfortably around her middle.

"Why can't you ever call me Hitsugaya-taicho?" he demanded suddenly, turning his head away, trying to sound cross.

"Well… we were reminiscing, and I always called you Shiro-chan then," she said with a smile he could hear in her voice, but not see.

"That's not what I asked," he said sharply.

"Well why can't I? We are friends aren't we?" she turned to look at him, her eyes a deep liquid brown.

"Hai, but," he broke off, not able to explain why he so desperately wanted **her** to call him 'Hitsugaya-taicho'.

She had always called Azien, the man she admired most, 'Aizen-taicho'. Why couldn't she admire him enough to call him 'Hitsugaya-taicho'?

Toshiro sighed and looked up at the ceiling, as far away from her worried gaze as he could get, his eyes reflecting a remembered pain.

'_**Aizen... He is dead, but he still haunts us.'**_

Momo twisted her head awkwardly and saw those eyes. She didn't understand it, but she knew that she'd made him sad. It seemed like these days she always made him sad. It was all she was good for.

"I'm so sorry," she said.

Those green eyes flicked over to her face, "why?" he sounded tired.

"I always make you so sad," she said, tearing up. He was her precious friend, and she didn't want to make him unhappy. He always made her happy, so why could she no longer return the favour?

"It's not your fault," he said looking away again.

"Don't lie to me," she cried out, turning her body to face him fully.

"I-" he broke off, still not looking at her.

"You've always been there for me, whenever I was in trouble. Why won't you let me be there for you? If you're sad, or if I'm doing something wrong, tell me. I want to know, I want to help you," even Momo was surprised by the frustrated monologue that burst from her own lips.

Toshiro sighed and looked at her once, before averting his eyes once again, "even though he's gone and you've got a new taicho… you still-"

She cut him off before he could finish, "I don't care for Aizen Sousuke; I never did. He was right, I didn't know the real him, and I'm glad that I didn't,"

"Hinamori," he breathed, not knowing what to say next.

She interrupted him anyway, "Shiro-chan don't pity me, and don't think that I haven't moved on. I have, I know everything isn't completely right yet, but it's getting there. Isn't it?" she asked anxiously.

She wasn't just asking him if he thought that everything was alright in Seireitei.

She was asking if everything was alright between them.

He hesitated before answering her, "I don't know Hinamori, is it?" his arm dropped from around her waist, and the warm body so close her own shifted away.

Momo felt like she'd been slapped across the face, but conceded that she probably deserved it. She'd been such a fool during the Arrancar war and about Aizen in general.

Toshiro was surprised when her arms slid around him and she pulled him back against her. "Shiro-chan," she whispered, her breath was warm on his cheek, "I want things to be okay between us again,"

"So do I, but-" her fingers on his lips cut him off.

"I know it's been hard, because of Aizen, and… I didn't make things easier when I was recovering," that was an understatement, "but, can't we just leave the past in the past and make a new future? Together?"

Toshiro didn't know how he felt, but he knew what he wanted.

"We can only try," he offered.

He knew she was smiling, and he leaned back against her comfortably, his hand wrapping around hers. Neither of them noticed how much time had passed, but when they finally walked out of his office, the moon was beginning to set and the sky was beginning to lighten faintly.

He did as courtesy dictated, and walked her back to her room. They got a few curious looks- he knew what it looked like, but he wasn't holding her hand or groping her or anything.

Besides, the only Shinigami stumbling around at this time of night (well, early morning by now) were drunken idiots- like his fukutaicho.

He fervently hoped that news of this didn't reach Matsumoto. He didn't fancy being teased about 'dating Momo-chan!' for the rest of the week.

They paused outside her room, and he suddenly felt very uncertain.

He'd walked her back here hundreds of times, but that was before Aizen's betrayal and Hinamori's recovery. This was new territory, and he was completely uncertain of how to act around her now.

Her outburst before had revealed something new… she was over Aizen, maybe not completely, but… she was getting there, and maybe she might…

Toshiro suppressed the wild flare of hope his thoughts had ignited.

The pause was getting slightly uncomfortable now; it had been over a minute since either of them had spoken.

He opened his mouth, "I-uh… this was fun. We should do it again," he mentally winced- wasn't he oh so clever, and oh so charming?

'_You have a lot to learn about talking to women,'_ Hyorinmaru observed from the depths of his mind.

Hinamori looked a little surprised, "hai, I'd like that," she said just as awkwardly.

'_Then again, you seem to understand each other well enough- they say success in love owes 80 of it's success to idiocy and 20 to luck.'_

'_**Shut up'**_ Toshiro mentally snapped.

He did not need to be abused by his Zanpakto right now; he had bigger problems, like speaking.

"Well, it's late," he said, and mentally slapped himself.

Momo was surprised when Tobiume jumped into conversation with her and dryly observed '_the boy's manner is quite rough- but that is part of his appeal, nei?'_

Momo flushed faintly- okay, so Hitsugaya-kun did have his good points, but the way her Zanpakto said it sounded almost like…

'_You're in love with him'_ Tobiume clarified.

The world stopped for a few seconds, Momo's face went red, her stomach twisted into knots and her thoughts were all over the place. Then time resumed.

'_**WHAT??'**_

Momo was stunned, she'd always been friends with Hitsugaya-kun, and well, she'd never thought of him that way. Had she??

"Oyasumi Hitsugaya-kun," she said quickly, almost stumbling in her haste to get away from him.

"Oyasumi Hinamori," he returned seconds before she slammed the door in his face.

Toshiro walked away, completely puzzled. Hinamori had never acted like that before.

Momo leant against the wall for a few seconds, and was relieved to feel his reiatsu move away with his footsteps. She sighed, feeling that odd tension uncurl from her stomach, before sliding down the wall, to sit on the floor.

'_**I am not in love with Hitsugaya-kun. I can't be… we're friends… I'**_

She covered her face with her hands, feeling tears run down her cheeks.

'_**What's wrong with me?'**_

* * *

Momo woke up and instead of sitting up, she just lay there, it was a beautiful morning, and the sun was shining brightly. In stark contrast she felt completely miserable, she'd cried herself to sleep, and her eyes were still sore.

'_**I can't be in love with Hitsugaya-kun'**_

She couldn't understand why the thought of that upset her so much. She just lay there, half hoping for the world to come to an end so she wouldn't have to feel like this any more.

What felt like hours passed before a knocking came on the shoji doors, "Ano, Hinamori-fukutaicho, this is ninth-seat Watanbe, are you in there?"

Momo waited a few minutes, "hai," and then paused briefly, "please tell Kurosaki-taicho that I won't be in today," she finally said.

She didn't want to move from her bed, she didn't want to do anything; she just wanted to stay here. She covered her head with the blankets, but couldn't sleep; instead, she stared blankly at the white cotton until she got too hot. She pulled the sheets down, and stared at the white walls of her room instead.

She knew it was hours later when someone else rapped on her door, the sun had moved the shadows around her room.

"Hinamori," Hitsugaya-kun's voice sounded clearly through her door.

"Go away," she said; and knowing exactly how childish it was, she buried her head under the pillow, willing him and his voice to disappear.

"Hinamori, open the door now," his voice was concerned- that was bad; she didn't really want to worry him.

It was a thousand times worse that his voice seemed to have some strange power over her though. She found herself slowly moving off her futon and she walked to the door, and opened it before she'd even thought about saying no.

She didn't even think to dress properly, he'd seen her in a yukata before, and modesty didn't really concern her at this point.

She looked into deep green eyes and realised that she was so tired and sad that she was completely empty. She really didn't want to see him or anyone right now.

"Are you alright?" he asked, one hand reaching out to touch her cheek.

"Hai," she said and shied away from his hand, backing into her room.

"Hinamori," he frowned.

"I am fine. There is no need for you to be here, so just go," she said sharply, not looking at him, anywhere but him.

"You're obviously not fine," he argued, stepping forward, into her room; into her space.

"Go away," she stepped back, "this has nothing to do with you," the closer he got, the more upset she felt. She felt crowded, suffocated almost, her heart was racing, her stomach was upset and she knew that any second she was going to cry.

"Hinamori," he took a step back.

"You can't help me," she said, taking advantage of his confusion, "you never can when I need you," she threw that comment viciously at his weak spot. He had to leave; he couldn't see her break down.

For a few seconds there was complete silence, apparently she'd surprised him. She'd certainly surprised herself with those words.

"I see."

The voice that said it was cool and distant. He'd never used that tone with her before.

She looked up to see the tenth division's insignia walking away from her. She froze, unable to move from her door. It wasn't pride that held her there, it was fear.

_**How could I say that to you?**_

He wouldn't be able to forgive her this time. She'd lost someone she cared about again, and this time it was all her fault. She just watched him walk away, unable to do anything else.

What she didn't see was the hurt tears that lingered in green eyes, which grew frostier, as hurt turned to anger. Anger turned to rage, which he trapped behind the same icy façade he used to control his reiatsu.

_**If you don't need me, then I have no purpose. **_

_**Without you, I am nothing.**_

* * *

Toshiro was not having a good day. He'd had that… 'talk'- it hadn't even been an argument with Hinamori yesterday, and it had completely destroyed any possibility of anything good ever happening to him.

He was currently engaged in picking up research materials for Kurotsechi-taicho. A strange Hollow- with reiatsu patterns unpredictable enough to merit a taicho and several of his ranked officers going after it.

All the other taicho had been quick enough to come up with an excuse, except him. It was always him, he always got given the worst jobs, normally he didn't mind, but today he really did.

He took one look at the strange Hollow that raged before him, "Matsumoto, stay back," he ordered, drawing his Zanpakto.

He couldn't care less about the unknown abilities that might be present in it. He was just in the mood to beat the stuffing out of something, and this Hollow was very convenient.

Who cared if Kurotsechi wanted it alive?

Toshiro wanted it dead.

Rangiku didn't like the order, or the hurt in her taicho's big green eyes. His reiatsu didn't seem to be as calm as usual; in fact it was very badly controlled, only just reined in. She didn't think he was in any state to be in battle, but she didn't have enough rank to keep him out of it.

'_Taicho, what is wrong? Is it to do with Momo-chan?'_

He'd been in a bad mood ever since going to check on her yesterday. Kurosaki-taicho had made a special visit to the tenth division to tell them that Momo-chan hadn't gone into work. So Hitsugaya-taicho had gone to check on her, and had come back a completely different person.

Hitsugaya-taicho didn't waste a second, he blindly charged the Hollow, slicing it's arm off with Hyorinmaru. He landed less than a second after the Hollow began screaming.

Rangiku wondered if she was overreacting. Perhaps her taicho was just impatient, and he'd studied the creature well enough (in the two seconds before his charge) to be confident of defeating it.

Whatever it was, he certainly seemed to be handling it with no problem. He was always telling her to be careful. So she wasn't sure if she was proud or vexed by his battle strategy or lack thereof. He didn't seem to be endangering himself she decided, so she would stay out of it like he'd ordered her to.

Hitsugaya-taicho took a second swipe at the creature, and neatly split it in two.

He landed neatly in front of his officers, sheathing Hyorinmaru while the creature behind him dissolved. He walked calmly towards them and just as the last of the darkness dissolved he reached Rangiku.

"Let's go," he said walking past her, his reiatsu still stormy, and nowhere near it's usual calm state.

Rangiku took a step to follow him, her step hesitated however when she noticed the tiny trickle of blood run down his left hand. She immediately covered her hesitation by bolding walking after him.

Such a small wound wasn't at all serious, and he did have a reputation to maintain.

Still Rangiku wondered, what had put him in this mood? Because it was very a dangerous one; not only for his opponents, but for himself.

"Nei, taicho, what's wrong?" Rangiku asked cheerfully.

"Why would anything be wrong?" he asked back monotonously.

Rangiku wondered if she should reply truthfully, or lie… which would get better results?

"You were in an odd mood, and careless with that Hollow, that's not like you," she used the truth, but modified it… a lot- what did they call that? - 'Damage control'

She pulled out the bandaid. The cut on his left shoulder from the Hollow- a lucky slice with it's fangs while he had been spliting it's head, was as long as her little finger and barely even a cut, it was so thin, but strangely deep. She'd decided to bandaid it, because every time he stretched or even moved his shoulder, he reopened it, and the trickles of blood were a nuisance to clean up.

"It was nothing really, just… an awkward day yesterday," he said neutrally.

Rangiku decided to talk to Momo-chan as soon as she got the chance. 'Awkward' was obviously not the right word for whatever had happened between them yesterday. 'Catastrophic' was probably closer to the truth.

She carefully placed the bandaid over the cut, and smoothed it on gently, but he still winced.

"Sorry taicho," she immediately said, feeling very mother-like in this role.

"No, you were very gentle, it just stings for some reason," he gave her a tired smile. He pulled his gi back up, and readjusted the ties, resettling his robes to hang properly.

"Arigato Matsumoto," he said, before leaving the office.

Rangiku watched him leave in disbelief; he really had to be upset.

Tomorrow was the last day of the month- all the month's paperwork was due in by then, and they still had some to finish.

She waited fifteen minutes just to be sure, but finally realised that he wasn't returning. He'd actually left her with the paperwork…

She finally settled herself at a desk and began on one stack, keeping a careful eye on the door. If anyone knew she would actually do paperwork without being yelled at, her reputation was gone. She was worried about him though, really worried.

****

**End of Part One.**

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I hope you liked it, please R & R- I can't get any better unless I know what I am doing wrong!!

Translation of Japanese Words:

_Arigato-_ Thank you

_Ba- _old woman/grandma

_Baka-_ Idiot

_Chan-_ a suffix indicating a close relationship, often used by girls and when addressing someone younger.

_Dai Suki-_ I like/love you (since it is more casual than 'Aishiteru', it is more common, very common in first time confessions of love/liking)

_Fukutaicho-_ Vice-Captain/Vice Unit Commander

_Gambatte- _Go for it/Come on (encouraging word... almost a cheer)

_Hai-_ Yes/Correct

_Kawaii-_ Cute/pretty

_Kun-_ a suffix considered quite familiar, often used for addressing classmates and friends.

_Ma-_ hey/okay (used twice in a sentence, sort of like saying, okay okay- as in calm down- sort of patronising I suppose)

_Nei-_ Hey

_Reiatsu-_ Soul Power

_Rukongai-_ This is part of Soul Society outside of Seireitei, anyone not in Seireitei dwells here.

_Sama-_ honorific- generally means master/lord, used only in cases of high respect.

_San-_ a suffix considered polite, often used for addressing people who you don't know well.

_Seireitei-_ The city in Soul Society where the Shinigami and nobility dwell.

_Shinigami-_ Death God

_Shunpo- _Flash Steps

_Soutaicho-_ Head Captain/Commander General

_Taicho-_ Captain/Unit Commander

_Tensai- _Genius

_Tsuki- _derivative from 'dai tsuki'

_Yukata-_ light cotton robe, sometimes used for sleeping in, but can also be daywear.

_Zanpakto-_ Soul Slayer (the sword a Shinigami carries)

**--I think I covered any words people might be unfamiliar with, but if I missed one let me know!!**


	2. Part 2: Beyond Hope

**Aren't you impressed that I am back so quickly?- I know I am.**

**Well anyway, I hope you enjoy, and my apologies to HitsuMatsu fans, but... I can't realistically see them as anything except brother-sister relationship.**

**Besides, HitsuHina rules!!**

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Part Two: Beyond Hope

The next day Hitsugaya Toshiro was in a very bad mood, and all around Seireitei the temperatures dropped drastically. Several members of the tenth division had to be checked into the fourth division- they required immediate treatment for frostbite.

Toshiro had a headache, his shoulder was killing him- right where that baka Hollow had cut him, and he was feeling very hot. He hated the heat, and this combined with the pain he was already in, sent any good mood he might have possibly woken with to the futherest reaches of his soul.

He stomped into the taicho/fukutaicho meeting, leaving frost and ice in his wake. He barely noticed that all present were wearing scarves… actually Ukitate was completely covered in blankets.

"Let's get this over with," Toshiro practically growled.

Yamamoto-Soutaicho obliged… not that he was scared of Hitsugaya-taicho exactly… but… he just thought it was safer to try and avoid fighting the tensai when he was in such a bad mood. The Soutaicho had no desire to become an ice cube. Even Kurotschei Mayuri and Zaraki Kenpatchi who argued in almost every meeting avoided talking for once.

The meeting only took twelve minutes, eighteen seconds- which was a new record. No one talked about it though, as soon as it officially ended, they just started walking out (and away from Hitsugaya-taicho) as quickly as possible.

Unfortunately for the peace Kyoraku-taicho opened his mouth. It seemed that since he and his fukutaicho were almost out the door that they believed that they were safe. He was once again having an irritating that word banter with his fukutaicho.

"But kawaii, kawaii Nanao-chan," Kyoraku-taicho protested, "surely you cannot doubt that my heart- wasted as it is after all these years of pining for you, is entirely faithful to you, and you alone!"

"Kyoraku-taicho it is completely absurd for you to keep making these declarations to me," the slender fukutaicho reprimanded, "and I don't think you can claim to be completely faithful to me after flirting with those new recruits just this morning," she added irately, adjusting her glasses.

Kyoraku-taicho immediately stopped walking, and sweeping his arms wide, "my Nanao-chan, you were jealous, but there is no need to fear, I swear to you that my love for you is eternal and shall not fade!" he gathered her into his arms, holding her tightly.

"Taicho," Ise-fukutaicho protested, trying to squeeze out of his arms.

"There is no need to be shy and hide our overwhelming feelings Nanao-chan. Come let us seal them with a ki-" Kyorak-taicho continued.

"DAMNIT YOU BAKAS JUST KISS ALREADY!" Hitsugaya-taicho interrupted unexpectedly, looking rather like death incarnate.

Ise-fukutaicho stopped struggling; in fact, she clung on to Kyoraku-taicho rather like he was the only thing who stood between her and sudden death.

He probably was, or at least he'd try, but with a rampaging, bad tempered Hitsugaya-taicho his success was bound to be limited.

"Ma, ma, Hitsugaya-taicho, let's all take a deep breathe and calm-" Ukitake-taicho was the only man brave enough to speak up in the silence that followed.

"The only thing that is more irritating than watching those two dancing around with their pathetic masquerade is you and Unohana-taicho pretending you are completely oblivious to each other!" yelled Hitsugaya-taicho rounding on the 'other Shiro-chan'.

There was a deadly silence, during which Ukitake-taicho and Unohana-taicho exchanged very awkward, highly embarrassed glances.

Hitsugaya-taicho stormed off, and no one dared to follow him, or speak until the sound of his sandals against the wooden floor faded into nothing.

"Well, that was very interesting," commented Matsumoto-fukutaicho slyly, eyeing her best friend, who was turning a noticeable pink under her glasses.

"Well I suppose that we should discuss what we can do to alleviate Hitsugaya-taicho's anger," commented Kyoraku Shunsui with a casualness that fooled no one. "Now what was it he told us to do Nanao-chan? I think it was along the lines of 'kiss', nei Jushiro?"

"Hai Shunsui," commented Ukitake-taicho, looking up at the ceiling, and very deliberately not at Unohana-taicho.

"You know, I really have to be going, there's a lot of paperwork to do," commented Ise-fukutaicho quickly.

There was a brief pause, "you can put me down now taicho," she added sharply.

"But we haven't helped Hitsugaya-taicho get rid of his anger, my sweet Nanao-chan," said Kyoraku-taicho, looking at her beaseachingly.

"Hitsugaya-taicho is quite noticeably not here taicho," his fukutaicho commented dryly.

"I had no idea that you were such an exhibitionist Nanao-chan," declared Kyoraku-taicho roguishly, with a big smile.

She went bright red for several seconds and found the ceiling immensely interesting, "taicho," she protested.

"Let us go and find Hitsugaya-taicho and demonstrate to him, how well we will adhere to his advice," he said walking, and carrying his fukutaicho with him.

"Taicho," said Ise-fukutaicho, finally managing to wiggle an arm out of his hold, "put me down now," she held her book threateningly above his head.

"You're so charming when you're aggressive," Kyoraku-taicho smiled and made a kissy face at her.

Her response was predictable.

She whacked him and jumped out of his arms, "taicho, please excuse me, but I have paperwork to finish," she said, before walking out of the room, still red cheeked.

Kyoraku-taicho held his head in his hands, "itai, my Nanao-chan is so cold to me," he moaned.

His response was almost as predictable as hers.

Ukitake-taicho looked suspiciously like he was tyring not to laugh. But no one else gave Kyoraku Shunsui the same courtesy. The room was awash with laughter, and even Kuchiki-taicho unbent enough to give a small chuckle.

Then came the fatal noise.

"KEEP IT DOWN!"

Everyone immediately stopped laughing at the sound of Hitsugaya-taicho's voice. Talk about a moody teenager.

Hinamori Momo sighed miserably to herself; she couldn't help wondering if it was her fault that Hitsugaya-kun was acting that way. She still couldn't believe that she'd said those things to him. How could she possibly apologise for this?

She didn't notice Matsumoto Rangiku's eyes regarding her very seriously from the other side of the room. They obviously needed to have a talk, very urgently.

* * *

Toshiro still wondered why Ukitate and Kyoraku were such idiots. They were in love and the women they loved obviously loved them back.

So what was the problem?

If you had the opportunity to have a relationship and the feelings were mutual- why wouldn't you begin it?

He knew the true reason he'd yelled at them. Frustration and jealousy, at seeing them be able to have something he longed for with all of his being. But Hinamori had completely destroyed any possibility he had of being with her.

'_You can't help me, _

'_You never can when I need you,'_

And he didn't want anyone else.

He pushed himself into his paperwork, trying to find a distraction, but instead he only found irritation, a worse temper, more pain and exhaustion.

'_Toshiro, we… problem… hurry,' _Hyorinmaru's voice had never been so unclear, even at their first meeting, when he'd been so clueless and powerless.

A worried Toshiro descended to his inner world, and realised too late, that he was trapped, and in very big trouble. He'd underestimated the Hollow, it's real attack had only just begun.

In Seireitei, Hitsugaya Toshiro's body collapsed on his desk, and his reiatsu pulsed wildly, before beginning to diminish.

* * *

Unohana Retsu did not feel as calm as she looked.

Hitsugaya-taicho had been sent into the fourth division minutes after his reiatsu had alerted his officers to his unconscious status. He was currently not responding to any of the treatment she'd tried. He remained comatose, and Retsu was beginning to get worried. The only possible indication for what had caused this was a tiny cut on his left shoulder.

Isane-san and Matsumoto-fukutaicho were both standing close by, awaiting orders or questions. But Retsu didn't really know what she could say.

Matsumoto-fukutaicho's voice was very strained, "how could this have happened, Hitsugaya-taicho- he," her voice broke.

"I believe that the source of this must be the Hollow that wounded him yesterday," Retsu said calmly. Inwardly though she wondered, how could she have missed it until now?

"I will need the two of you to leave now," she said, setting Minatzuki down beside the unconscious boy. Her actions made it clear that there was no use arguing with her.

She still waited until she heard the shoji doors slide closed before she took Hitsugaya-taicho's right hand, holding it within her own.

"Gambatte Hitsugaya-taicho," she whispered. "We've lost enough people because of Aizen Sousuke, we don't need to lose you too," she said, and perhaps it was just her imagination, but his pulse seemed a little stronger.

"Minatzuki," she called, summoning the giant beast, "now, we must heal Hitsugaya-taicho,"

The giant beast regarded the boy thoughtfully before opening his huge mouth and swallowing him. She immediately merged her consciousness with her Zanpakto's. The real world faded into a watery green one and Retsu descended.

She passed through the barriers that Hitsugaya-taicho used to guard himself, down to his reiatsu, the core of his being, into his inner world.

He had clearly been infected by the Hollow; the darkness of it's reiatsu was slowly devouring the light of Hitsugaya-taicho's. He was fading.

She automatically sent some of her own energy to burn away the darkness and was alarmed when the Hollow taint absorbed her reiatsu as well.

"_Unohana-taicho, stop,"_

"Hitsugaya-taicho," she acknowledged.

"_You're exposing yourself to it,"_ he continued.

Retsu considered this, "but,"

"_Leave here now. While it is consuming me it will not attack you. Don't let your reiatsu make contact with it again. Don't let any other person's reiatsu make contact with it,"_

"There must be a way to cure you," she said.

"_It consumes reiatsu, the more you attack the stronger it gets. I can contain it within me, as long as no one else is exposed, and gather my energy to destroy it within me, but I need time,"_

"Perhaps Inoue Orihime's gift could help," Retsu suggested.

"_NO- if her reiatsu is exposed to it then she'll be infected, even if her energy takes a different form to that of a Shinigami,"_

"But in case the worst should-" she protested.

"_It is a part of me now, we have merged, if she brought me back from the dead, this would come back with me. I am tainted irreversibly. No one else can fight this battle for me, if I can't defeat this enemy, then I will die. You cannot help me" _

There was almost a satisfied bleakness in those last words as she fully understood what was happening to him.

"I'm a physician Hitsugaya-taicho; I exist to heal people," she countered, trying to think of another solution.

"_If you must try to help me, at least promise not to let anyone's reiatsu come into contact with mine. I don't want anyone else to be infected- please!"_

There was no mistaking the desperation present in his voice. She knew that as much as he tried to shield his thoughts from hers, there was one person above all, whom he wanted to spare from this.

_Hinamori Momo_

His best hope was healing by reiatsu, but Retsu knew as a physician that he was right. If this thing was as infectious as he believed it was, then no one could come into contact with it. If it spread, it could be the end of the Gotei Thirteen.

No taicho's life was worth that, not even the Soutaicho's. They both knew that.

"I promise,"

She let her presence drift out of his world, back to the green world of her own mind. She pulled her consciousness out of Minatzuki and back to the real world.

"_I'm sorry that I had to lie to you, Unohana-taicho,"_ Hitsugaya Toshiro whispered as he felt her reiatsu leave his body.

* * *

"MOMO-CHAN!" yelled a rather tipsy sounding Rangik-san.

"Rangiku-san?" Momo questioned.

"Ah- there you are," the taller woman swayed and almost fell on top of Momo, "arigato Momo-chan," Rangiku-san acknowledged.

"Why were you looking for me?- Hitsugaya-kun, is he alright?" she urgently asked.

"He's fine, still sleeping. Unohana-taicho said he'll wake up and he'll be perfectly fine!" Rangik-san began swaying again, "anyway I figured that while he was asleep I could catch up on my drinking, and that I could talk to you without interference… actually I meant to talk to you first, but I got thirsty while I was looking," the blonde confessed.

Momo sweatdropped, "I see," she said nervously, "and what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Yester- oh wait, it was," Rangiku-san counted on her fingers, "two days ago now. You and taicho had a talk, and he wouldn't tell me about it. So now you're going to tell me about it!"

The foolishly drunk woman, actually looked very threatening as she pulled Momo closer, looking her directly in the eye.

Momo felt herself shrink, "hai Rangiku-san," she muttered

Somehow, she told Rangiku-san everything… absolutely everything. Things she hadn't told Abarai-kun or Kira-kun, even things she hadn't told Hitsugaya-kun. She was surprised by how good she felt afterwards.

Rangiku listened to the flood that came out of the younger girl's mouth, and found it impossible to be anything other than amazed. How could two people, who were obviously in love, make such a mess of a perfectly simple situation?

"Momo-chan. How do you feel about Hitsugaya-taicho?" Rangiku asked, and put a hand over the other girl's mouth to stop her speaking, "I mean how do you really feel?" she said sternly, before releasing Momo-chan.

Momo-chan didn't speak for a few moments, "we're good friends, we've always been close,"

"Momo-chan," Rangiku scolded.

"I don't know any more," the girl admitted quietly, "I thought we were only friends- but, he is, and now I-" she broke off.

"You're still scared of getting hurt because of Aizen Sousuke," Rangiku observed.

Momo-chan sighed, "it's- I-"

"Hitsugaya-taicho is different to Aizen. He'd never hurt you,"

"I'm not scared of Hitsugaya-kun; it's my own feelings that scare me. I'm scared of myself," Momo-chan finally admitted.

"Did you ever think that maybe Hitsugaya-taicho is as scared of this as you are?"

Momo was about to ridicule Rangiku-san's words, but something about the tone of the sentence stopped her.

"I think, that when you are talking about how you feel for someone, the best thing you can do is tell them as honestly and openly how you feel. It might not work out, but, it's better than always wondering," Rangiku-san said.

There was nothing Momo could say to this except, "arigato Rangiku-san,"

Kira-kun suddenly burst into the room- it seemed that Rangiku-san wasn't the only one who'd found the sake… except Rangiku-san didn't seem so tipsy.

"Oh Kira, there you are!" Rangik-san half screamed, she moved towards him and almost fell in the process.

Momo sweatdropped- it seemed that Rangik-san was actually still very tipsy.

The drunken pair made their way out the door, and noticing Rangiku-san's arm settled around Kira-kun's waist, and his arm on her shoulders, Momo wondered if the blonde should perhaps take her own advice. They made a cute couple, and they seemed to be getting closer each day.

'_Hitsugaya-kun, when you wake up, we will resolve this. Rangiku-san is right, and... It's not fair if I don't tell you how I feel, and I want to know… do you feel anything for me anymore?'_

* * *

Unohana Retsu didn't like the reiatsu patterns that Hitsugaya-taicho's body contained.

The boy's reiatsu was beginning to drop rapidly, by invading his inner mind she'd obviously forced him to use a lot of his vital energy. She couldn't do that again, he'd be dead if she did.

He'd said he needed time to defeat it, but… if it continued at this rate; he would die before he could beat it. His energy was fading, and his body functions were also beginning to fail.

What felt worst of all in this situation was that she felt as if she'd told a huge lie- to all of the tenth division and all of her colleagues.

She'd told them he would be fine, that he just needed plenty of rest to rid his body of this infection. Only the Soutaicho knew the truth of the seriousness of the infection. They had both thought it pointless to worry others.

She hadn't realised that Hitsugaya-taicho had deceived her.

Retsu studied the charts again, she felt as if there was something she was missing. It took her two careful examinations before she finally understood.

Hitsugaya-taicho had already abandoned the fight for his life as a lost cause. He was fighting the invader of his body in the only way he could- he was destroying himself so that Seireitei would not have to deal with an enemy on the inside.

It was an eminently sensible strategy; defend what you could, but… it brought tears to her eyes.

She knew what she had to do in this situation; she had to respect his wishes.

No taicho's life was worth putting Seireitei at risk.

Unohana Retsu left to see the Soutaicho urgently for the second time that day.

* * *

An hour later it was official. Hitsugaya Toshiro, the taicho of the tenth division, had been infected by that mysterious Hollow, and he was dying.

No one was allowed to attempt any sort of healing that was not permitted by Unohana-taicho and the Soutaicho. He was otherwise allowed visitors, but absolutely no reiatsu contact was permitted.

To this end, the people thought most likely to break this rule, had actually been handcuffed and their reiatsu temporarily suppressed. The Soutaicho would not allow this infection to spread. He had however ordered the twelfth division to create a cure that involved no reiatsu contact, but they had not had any success so far.

Half the tenth division, as well as close friends of the tenth division's taicho had packed themselves into the halls of the fourth division, outside his room.

When the fourth division taicho coldly asked what they were doing, Matsumoto-san had replied; "making enough noise to wake taicho up,"

Hinamori-san added, "Hitsugaya-kun needs all of our encouragement," and then she'd added "please Unohana-taicho," with teary eyes.

Everyone else had suspiciously watery looking eyes and Retsu had completely caved, as long as they kept the noise down.

****

**The End of Part Two**

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* * *

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To anyone who made it this far- I really am glad you like it, please R & R!!

**Translation of Japanese Words:**

_Arigato-_ Thank you

_Ba- _old woman/grandma

_Baka-_ Idiot

_Chan-_ a suffix indicating a close relationship, often used by girls and when addressing someone younger.

_Dai Suki-_ I like/love you (since it is more casual than 'Aishiteru', it is more common, very common in first time confessions of love/liking)

_Fukutaicho-_ Vice-Captain/Vice Unit Commander

_Gambatte-_ Come one/ Go for it (encouraging word... almost a cheer)

_Hai-_ Yes/Correct

_Kawaii-_ Cute/pretty

_Kun-_ a suffix considered quite familiar, often used for addressing classmates and friends.

_Ma-_ hey/okay (used twice in a sentence, sort of like saying, okay okay- as in calm down- sort of patronising I suppose)

_Nei-_ Hey

_Reiatsu-_ Soul Power

_Rukongai-_ This is part of Soul Society outside of Seireitei, anyone not in Seireitei dwells here.

_Sama-_ honorific- generally means master/lord, used only in cases of high respect.

_San-_ a suffix considered polite, often used for addressing people who you don't know well.

_Seireitei-_ The city in Soul Society where the Shinigami and nobility dwell.

_Shinigami-_ Death God

_Shunpo- _Flash Steps

_Soutaicho-_ Head Captain/Commander General

_Taicho-_ Captain/Unit Commander

_Tensai- _Genius

_Tsuki- _derivative from 'dai tsuki'

_Yukata-_ light cotton robe, sometimes used for sleeping in, but can also be daywear.

_Zanpakto- _Soul Slayer (the sword that the Shinigami's all carry)

* * *


	3. Part 3: Beyond Life and Death

**Okay, this is the final segment.**

**-Hope you enjoy the conclusion, as (if you've come this far) much as you enjoyed the rest of it.**

**Since writing the above I've re-edited a little, fixed up a few spelling errors, so I hope it is more comphrehensible, and please if anything is wrong tell me- I can't correct it if you don't tell me!**

**

* * *

**

Part Three: Beyond Life and Death

Hitsugaya Toshiro was dying. Momo knew that, and she also knew that there was no miracle that could bring Hitsugaya-kun back, and no way for her to tell him that she… that she…

She'd never admitted it to anyone, not even herself, even in the deepest parts of her mind. Losing Aizen was insignificant, it had hurt, but losing Hitsugaya-kun… that went so far beyond pain that she wondered if she would ever be able to recover.

She, her entire being, was torn and shattered, her heart, everything, and nothing could mend it. She knew that right now, she truly was broken beyond repair.

Momo left the party she had help to create, and lost herself in the quiet gardens of the fourth division. She couldn't bear it anymore.

Why had Rangiku-san forced her to realise it?

Why had Hitsugaya-kun gotten so ill, and decided to leave her?

Momo buried her face in her hands and wept, nothing in her life could be alright again now. If she didn't have his support… his love… then she was nothing, there was no meaning to her, nothing in her.

She didn't exist without him.

She couldn't stop crying, even when an alarmed Yachiru-chan found her and started shaking her. Isane-san appeared and forced her to drink something, and Momo suddenly found calm, for a few precious seconds before her world went black.

She vaguely realised that her body had gone limp and that she had hit the floor, before her awareness completely disappeared into darkness.

* * *

Unohana Retsu was worried.

She ran a damp cloth over Hitsugaya-taicho's face; his time was running out far too quickly. Unless Kurotsei-taicho came up with an antidote soon, Seireitei was going to lose another taicho.

Retsu felt like crying. Being a healer was a wonderful thing, when you could save a life, but when you had to watch your patient fade away… there was no greater curse.

She felt Ukitate-san's reiatsu seconds before his hand touched her shoulder, "are you alright?" he asked solemnly.

"I'm not dying," she said sharply, and was immediately remorseful, "I'm sorry Ukitate-san,"

He shook his head, "I understand," he said gently.

Retsu felt warm and vaguely happy, in spite of everything, simply because the way he said those words was so genuine, and she felt so… supported. She felt like she wasn't alone, and for anyone with a taicho rank, that was a rare feeling. Especially since the whole tenth division hated her for failing their taicho.

"Arigato Ukitate-san," she said, smiling for the only time since Hitsugaya-taicho had entered her division.

They both looked down at the boy, Ukitate's long fingers wound around her hand. She was vaguely reminded that she wasn't the only one who was fond of Hitsugaya-kun.

"Are you alright?" she asked him suddenly.

"It should be me," he said surprising her.

"No, it shouldn't be anyone," she said sharply.

He looked at her surprised, "forgive me Unohana-san, I spoke without thinking,"

She surprised them both by leaning on his shoulder, "he was right. We should not dance around our feelings. Even though we have long lives, there are no guarantees,"

His arm was suddenly around her, "he hasn't lost this fight yet Retsu. He is stubborn and he has people to come back for,"

His words ignited a new hope in her. As a healer, she had never yet seen anything overcome the power of love; miracles were always possible, as long as you still believed in them.

"Arigato Jyushiro," she whispered.

* * *

"Would you like a drink?" Nanao offered her best friend.

Kyoraku-taicho would probably be annoyed that she was going to dip into his private stash, but Rangiku needed it much more than he did at the moment.

"Hai," said Rangiku, but her bubbly act didn't fool Nanao one bit.

Rangiku adored her taicho, just like any fukutaicho did, and she was obviously very worried about him. Nanao knew that if she was in Rangiku's position she wouldn't be anywhere near as controlled as Rangiku was being. She admired Rangiku's self-control in this difficult situation.

Hitsugaya-taicho had better recover, for Rangiku's sake. After the mess with Ichimaru Gin, Rangiku needed her taicho more than ever, and so did Momo-chan…

Kami-sama.

Nanao was not ordinarily the type of woman who believed in prayers, but, _'onegai, don't take Hitsugaya-taicho away now. Rangiku and Momo-chan need him, onegai,'_

She felt a warm hand on her shoulder, "taicho," she mumbled, seeing a familiar flash of pink out of the corner of her eye.

He wordlessly held out a bottle of sake, he was almost as fond of Rangiku as she was.

The hand on her shoulder slipped down until he had a firm grip on her upper arm. He pulled her into his arms briefly, and for once, she didn't resist, he smelt of sake and sakura.

"Nanao-chan, I know I am not often serious, but I never say anything I don't mean," his voice was deep and had no trace of a joke in it. "Hitsugaya was right; there isn't any guarantee or any reason for us to avoid our feelings."

Nanao forgot how to breath, "taicho," she whispered.

"What?" he asked softly.

"I-" she started crying, and didn't understand why the tears wouldn't stop. She wasn't the one who was hurting most- that was Rangiku and Momo-chan.

"It will be alright Nanao. Hitsugaya has someone who desperately wants him back; he'd never leave her behind. As I will never leave you behind. You'll see,"

There was a thump and they both looked to see that Rangiku had fallen into a drunken heap and was crying.

Nanao pulled her friend into her arms. "It will be alright Rangiku, Shunsui is right, Hitsugaya-taicho isn't so weak," she whispered.

Rangiku started shaking and Nanao worriedly questioned her, "are you alright? Rangiku? -Rangiku?" she repeated.

She finally realised that the woman was not crying as she'd feared, but laughing.

"You just called Kyoraku-taicho, 'Shunsui',"

Nanao gaped, and noticed Shunsui giving her a smirk, "well I just," Nanao protested, and then suddenly, it didn't matter. "Yes Rangiku, I did call him Shunsui," she admitted without any shame.

Rangiku and Shunsui's mouths both fell open, and Nanao almost laughed.

Rangiku suddenly smiled, "good," and then she looked to the door of the room where her taicho lay, "taicho," she whispered.

"As long as he is alive, there is still hope," Nanao reminded her.

"Arigato Nanao, Kyoraku-taicho," Rangiku said, her eyes distant.

'_Momo-chan, most of all I want Hitsugaya-taicho to wake up, so that he can hear what you need to tell him,'_

* * *

Momo's awareness drifted, and suddenly she found herself in a familiar world full of plum trees. The trees had been in full bloom, but the flowers were falling faster than they appeared and the trees were becoming bare, empty. The biggest still held some blossoms, but it too was succumbing.

This was Tobiume's world, a reflection of her soul.

'_**Momo-chan, you should not give up on yourself or him so easily,'**_

'_But it is hopeless, I'm losing him, and I can't bear it,'_

'_**He is not lost to you yet,'**_

'_But I can barely sense his reiatsu, it's fading and Inoue-san might not be able to revive him without this taint. He is leaving me!'_ she panicked.

'_**Foolish child, a person who exists in your heart cannot leave. Even if their soul has been changed or destroyed, they still remain, and even if you cannot sense them, they still exist. Call him; make him return to you,'**_

'_But-'_

'_**Do you truly believe that Toshiro would not come should you call? He never once ignored you in his life, he always protected you. If you believe in nothing else, not even yourself, believe in that!'**_

Momo's consciousness drifted into another part of her soul, it was dark, she couldn't see anything, and she was alone. Tobiume's voice no longer reached her ears.

'_Hitsugaya-kun would never ignore me, unless he was beyond my reach,'_

Silly Tobiume, how could she reach him now? He was barely here anymore, he was leaving, fading, dying.

'_Hitsugaya-kun,'_

"Hinamori," his familiar voice rolled out her name.

'_Shiro-chan?'_

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Hitsugaya-taicho?" he growled.

'_It's really you, but how?' _this was impossible.

"Baka, how do you think I would know?"

'_That's so mean Shiro-chan!'_

"Hinamori, what's wrong?" his voice was softer, sadder. She could almost feel the warmth of his breath on her skin.

'_What do you mean Hitsugaya-kun?'_ she asked, confused.

"I can feel your grief- why are you so upset?" his voice echoed deeply inside her, as if he were moving closer.

'_You're dying, and now I've lost you,'_ wasn't that reason enough?

A hazy image shone in the black depths of her mind, it shone brighter until a boy with white hair appeared. He walked over to her. His green eyes seemed softer than normal, and his wore a small smile. One of those smiles she had always loved.

She was surprised when Hitsugaya-kun wrapped his arms around her.

"What are you talking about Hinamori? You can't lose me; I still can feel you and see you as if you were right beside me,"

'_But I can barely sense you anymore,'_

"Is that true?"

He kissed her on the cheek, and disappeared.

'_Hitsugaya-kun? Hitsugaya-kun! HITSUGAYA-KUN!"_

* * *

A rough hand was patting her cheek, and then she was shaken roughly. The process was repeated; she stirred faintly, not really wanting to move.

"Hinamori-chan, wake up!" she recognised the rough voice of Abarai Renji.

She blinked and opened her eyes, "Abarai-kun," she murmured.

"Do you feel any better?" Kira-kun asked.

Momo shook her head. How could she feel better? Hitsugaya-kun was still dying.

Momo sat up and looked around. She saw Isane-san, Unohana-taicho and Rangik-san sitting nearby, it seemed that all three women had sunk into an exhausted sleep. Kyoraku-taicho was holding a sleeping Nanao-san, while Ukitate-taicho watched Unohana-taicho anxiously. Kurosaki-taicho and Rukia-san were sitting with several other shinigami, passing around cups of what appeared to be tea.

"It was just a dream," she murmured, half questioning herself.

Of course it was a dream.

"_Is that true?"_

His voice seemed to echo in her mind.

"I'm sorry, but," she looked at her two Academy friends, "I need to see him,"

They exchanged a look, one she couldn't interpret.

"You'd better hurry then," Abarai said.

So he was still alive.

"Arigato," Momo said, standing up and walking quickly to his door. She opened it before she could change her mind. She had to see him, she had to know. She closed it behind her before she even looked at the futon he lay on.

When she finally did, she just stared at him; he was so pale, just like ice. He was no less beautiful for his pallor, but, it was an uncomfortable reminder of his state. He was truly dying; Unohana-taicho had said that it was simply a matter of time, and that perhaps he could still defeat this… thing that was killing him.

No one had missed the sadness in the fourth division taicho's voice; she didn't think it was likely. No one did, and they all mourned for Hitsugaya-kun as if he was already dead.

Momo found tears come to her eyes, just when she'd truly thought she couldn't cry anymore. He was still, he was silent; he was dying.

Time's flow changed again, because Momo found herself thrown over that dreadfully still boy, holding him in her arms. Her head was on his chest and she couldn't stop herself from crying.

"Oh Hitsugaya-kun," she whispered, "Toshiro," she held him in her arms, and for once he wasn't telling her to let him go.

He wasn't saying anything back; he wasn't even asking her to address him as…

"Hitsugaya-taicho," she sobbed.

It seemed like such a little thing, so why hadn't she called him that at least once?

Was she really that selfish?

"I'm so sorry,"

'_Please don't let your last memories of me be those dreadful ones. Please, just give me one more chance to make you smile. I don't want you to die before I can call you Hitsugaya-taicho, just like you always wanted me to. PLEASE TOSHIRO,'_

Momo found her eyes slowly shutting, and comforted by having his cool body beside her own, she descended into darkness. Her fingers wrapping themselves tightly around his limp hands.

* * *

They were on ba-san's porch like they'd always done as children. He stood beside her, this time there was no watermelon between them.

"I think that this is goodbye Hinamori," he said seriously.

She knew how she should act, but she couldn't do it anymore.

"No, please stay, for me," she begged.

"Hinamori," he sounded puzzled.

"I don't know how you feel, and I know that everything between us is a mess, but, if you leave now," her voice broke.

He took over, "I tried telling you so many times, but I thought you understood me without words. I hoped you did, because it would have been easier than telling you-" he said, and broke off abruptly.

Warm arms held her against a warm body, and she gratefully slid her arms around him.

"Dai Suki Hi-Momo. I always have, and I always will, no matter if I am by your side or not; living or dead,"

She started crying in earnest, "I'm glad you told me, because the uncertainty was almost worse than losing you, but now. I lose another person I love, and I am being left alone, again,"

"Momo," he stroked her hair.

"Suki, Suki, SUKI! Toshiro. Why does it have to be this way?" she sobbed.

"Oh Momo," there was such a longing, such a passion in the way he said her name, "we wasted so much time."

"And now, there is none left," she said.

He didn't confirm or deny it, he simply held her.

The familiar darkness descended and her vision of him faded. She was suddenly lying on top of his cold body once again. She lifted herself up, but nothing had changed, he was lying there with the same peaceful expression on his face. It may have been just her imagination, but it seemed wistful.

She leaned further over him, staring down at his face.

How could he just? She'd just told him- and he'd just told her- and now he was-

How dare he even think about leaving her like this.

"You can't die, and leave me. You were always different, always someone I could trust, if you give up now…" Momo's tears dropped onto his face. Her breath caught, he really was amazingly beautiful in the dim lighting.

Before she had even thought about it, she leant down and placed her mouth gently on her best friend's. He tasted faintly of salt and his lips were dry.

"Toshiro, dai suki, doesn't that mean anything? Please, come back,"

She kissed him again, pressing her mouth desperately against his, tears still running down her face and onto his.

* * *

He watched the icy plain continue to fade into the blackness. It was coming for him, and he couldn't do anything more to stop it. He was tired and he was spent, he almost looked forward to that black oblivion.

'_Toshiro,_

'_Dai suki,_

'_Doesn't that mean anything?_

'_Please, come back,'_

Toshiro smiled and looked into the heart of the dark mist that raced towards him. He felt his energy begin to return, he wasn't beaten yet, and now, with her words thundering through his being…

Nothing could stop him now.

_**Arigato Momo**_**.**

* * *

Momo felt a sudden warmth pulse through the body beneath hers. She withdrew her mouth slightly and looked up.

She flushed a bright red; a slightly amused looking Rangiku-san was standing there. Momo wondered how long Rangik-san had been there, and if she could pretend that she had just slipped and accidentally landed in prime kissing position on top of Toshiro?

Rangiku-san's expression was similar to that of Yoruichi-san in cat form when she'd gloated about being about to perform Kido techniques that had baffled Kurosaki-taicho. Gleeful in the extreme… Momo knew that she was not going to get out of this so easily.

She was surprised at the groan that came out of the body beneath her. She and Rangiku-san immediately forgot the kiss and focused on the boy. His eyelids fluttered, before his eyes slowly opened, and he blinked a few times, focusing.

"Toshiro," Momo whispered.

He turned his head slightly and deep green eyes met hers, there was a warmth in them which made her giddy. There were tears running down her face again, but she barely felt them, she pulled him into a hug, ignored the strangled gasp.

"TAICHO!" Rangik-san screeched in a voice loud enough to echo all around Seireitei.

Toshiro winced, that was not a good wake up call in any sense, Momo's hug was, but Matsumoto's voice- who'd want to wake up to that?

He went bright red when less than a second later his head was once again shoved between his fukutaicho's two massive breasts. She'd grabbed him from Momo, and considering how upset Matsumoto sounded, he actually endured it… for a few seconds, but finally his irritation burst out.

"MATSUMOTO LET GO!"

The doors to his room slammed open within seconds and everyone in Seireitei whom he knew by name- and several people whose names he didn't remember, burst in.

He had no idea he was this popular. It would have been flattering, if not for the noise and the fact that he was completely squished into his fukutaicho again.

Completely pushed beyond the limits of his patience he yelled "GET OUT!"

Most obeyed, several argued, but Unohana commented that it was best for the patient to rest. He could have kissed her.

"But taicho just woke up, how could he need rest?" Matsumoto questioned.

"He has lost a considerable amount of reiatsu," Unohana countered.

Toshiro had been on the verge of killing his fukutaicho (he didn't like massive crowds when he was completely healthy- why would he want them when he felt quite weak still?) when she completely redeemed herself.

"Well, why doesn't Momo-chan stay to keep him company, until he falls asleep?" Matsumoto suggested.

"That's a good idea Rangiku," Ise-san agreed too quickly.

Toshiro sensed a conspiracy, but before he and Momo could protest, the crowd had evacuated, and the door was closed. It was just the two of them.

"Hit- Toshiro, before we say anything else. I didn't mean to say- well it wasn't that I, it's just, well," she stuttered, before finally saying, "I am so sorry,"

"Apology accepted," he said calmly.

Momo gaped, "but I- you, how?"

"It doesn't matter," he said, and then there was a brief pause, "Momo, did you really mean it?" he finally asked.

She didn't answer him for several long minutes, and then finally she sighed, "you know me well enough to know that I don't lie, and I never say anything I don't mean,"

"Arigato Momo, if it wasn't for you-" he trailed off.

She walked over to sit beside him and took his hand in hers. "Promise me you won't scare me like that again," she whispered.

"Nothing is certain Momo, I can only try. We both have dangerous lives,"

He wouldn't lie to her, he never had before, and being in a relationship with her wouldn't change that.

"I don't understand how you heard me though, you were unconscious," she blushed faintly.

He smiled, and pulled her against him with one hand, "I thought you understood Momo, I never ignore you. You're the most important person in the world to me,"

"Toshiro," she found tears forming in her eyes.

"I already said that I can't promise you anything except that I would try, because we are Shinigami, but I will promise you this. As long as I am alive, I will stay by your side, and when I die, because I am in your heart, I'll still be with you. I won't leave you Momo, not ever," he held her in his arms.

"And as long as you're by my side, that the only promise I would ask you to make," she whispered, "I promise to be by your side, always, for as long as I am alive," she kissed his cheek gently.

He cupped her cheek in one hand and kissed her gently on the mouth. Nothing else needed to be said.

* * *

Toshiro and Momo had been right to suspect Rangiku of conspiracy- at that very moment the members of the SWA (Shinigami Women's Association) were pressed against the door. They weren't the only ones eavesdropping, but Nanao stood out clearly by taking notes of the words spoken.

"That was so sweet," Rangiku squealed.

"They've fallen silent again," Nemu reported.

A thoughtful silence fell around the group, as they tried to imagine what was going on in the room. It became more exotic as the silence became longer, until finally…

"You don't think they're…" Renji trailed off.

"They only just confessed," Kira protested, flushing.

"He couldn't get lucky that quickly… could he?" Hisagi Shuhei asked.

Rangiku immediately opened the doors.

The pair were not making out or anything else, instead they had fallen asleep. Toshiro's left arm was around Momo's shoulders, her head on his chest, and their right hands were loosely clasped.

"I think that we really should let them rest," Retsu said, as if she hadn't been listening as eagerly as the other women to the confession.

"Just a second," Rangiku said, pulling out a camera, and taking a quick snap shot of the sleeping couple. She then ruined the mood by grinning evilly, "taicho is going to kill me for this!" she declared.

**The End- Completely, this is it. No More.**

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Thanks to anyone who read it, I really hope you liked it. Please R & R

**Translation of Japanese Words:**

_Arigato-_ Thank you

_Ba- _old woman/grandma

_Baka-_ Idiot

_Chan-_ a suffix indicating a close relationship, often used by girls and when addressing someone younger.

_Dai Suki-_ I like/love you (since it is more casual than 'Aishiteru', it is more common, very common in first time confessions of love/liking)

_Fukutaicho-_ Vice-Captain/Vice Unit Commander

_Hai-_ Yes/Correct

_Kawaii-_ Cute/pretty

_Kun-_ a suffix considered quite familiar, often used for addressing classmates and friends.

_Ma-_ hey/okay (used twice in a sentence, sort of like saying, okay okay- as in calm down- sort of patronising I suppose)

_Nei-_ Hey

_Reiatsu-_ Soul Power

_Rukongai-_ This is part of Soul Society outside of Seireitei, anyone not in Seireitei dwells here.

_Sama-_ honorific- generally means master/lord, used only in cases of high respect.

_San-_ a suffix considered polite, often used for addressing people who you don't know well.

_Seireitei-_ The city in Soul Society where the Shinigami and nobility dwell.

_Shinigami-_ Death God

_Shunpo- _Flash Steps

_Soutaicho-_ Head Captain/Commander General

_Taicho-_ Captain/Unit Commander

_Tensai- _Genius

_Tsuki- _derivative from 'dai tsuki'

_Yukata-_ light cotton robe, sometimes used for sleeping in, but can also be daywear.

_Zanpakto-_ Soul Slayer


End file.
